I’m sat writing this blog post in my final year student house, with four major deadlines coming up over the next month and a half while applying for a masters degree and trying to get as much work experience as I can before I leave. That’s a hell of a lot of pressure for a twenty-year-old to feel.
I remember moving into my first-year accommodation and being absolutely terrified, and later that week being in the introductory lecture for my degree and thinking ‘oh my God I’m not going to be able to do this.’ It genuinely feels like it could have happened last week.
Two and a half years later, I’m munching my way through a packet of Oreos – way too quickly – and wondering if other final year university students feel the same way as me. Any and all reassurance is more than welcome.
I received my graduation date earlier this week. July eighteenth. Everything I have worked on and achieved over the past almost three years will have built up to that moment. How bloody scary is that?
I will admit, my first thought when I found out the date, was ‘what on Earth am I going to wear?’
But after that came the pure, intense fear of life after graduation. It feels like it’s the be all end all. Which I know is not true, as I’m friends with graduates and they’re all doing absolutely fine. But even so, man. The big wide world is waiting to swallow me.
Update: Packet of Oreos has now been devoured.
I’ve also been thinking about the friends I’ve made over the past few years. I have a fantastic group of girlfriends from my course, they are all so supportive and I am extremely proud of how much they achieve. Although I absolutely love them to pieces, there’s a cloud of doubt forming in my mind about what we’ll be like after we leave the safety of university.
I’m sure we’ll still talk in our Facebook group chat each day and try our best to call each other, but we’re all going to be so busy and scattered across the country. If you’re a graduate, please tell me how close you are to your friends. Like, I understand we are probably going to drift apart, quite literally, but yeah. That’s a sad thought.
Moving back home is going to be really quite odd. Moving out and being completely independent has been brilliant for me. I pay my own rent, bills, buy washing up liquid because no one else in my house does and I really do enjoy living in the city.
I’ve said to many people that I don’t want to stay in Leicester after university, but part of me does think that I maybe will end up back here someday. It is actually so vibrant and there are always events happening. It also has a fab vegan community which I am yet to explore, even though I keep clicking ‘attending’ on Facebook events. I will go soon, I swear.
And finally, I have a 12,000-word report to write. Along with a photography portfolio, a five-minutes long documentary, radio demo and another two reports to write. All in two months. *screams*
Some of those projects I have started already, but for some, my mind is completely blank. I’m not really into documentaries, so why I decided to take a module which requires the creation of three documentaries is beyond me.
That’s a tip, only select modules at university that you actually want to do.
That’s almost everything that’s on my mind right now. If you’re a final year university student too, let me know what your concerns and worries are in the comments. Likewise, if you’re a graduate, share your successes and reassurances. Maybe we can create a little support community on this post 💖